The Twilight Saga – ECLIPSE: The Third Level of Hell

Last month, after years of putting it off, I began watching the Twilight Saga movies.

I’ve not read the books nor do I intend to read them.

This weekend, I watched the third in the Twilight Saga series, “Eclipse.”

Once again, I did not burst into flames nor did blood spurt from my eyes. I think I am building up a resistance.

OK, here goes (as per Jeremy Wheeler, at Rovi)…

The third film in the Twilight series explores a love triangle between Bella (Kristen Stewart), Edward (Robert Pattinson), and Jacob (Taylor Lautner) as the werewolf pack and the Cullen clan join together to fight a new breed of vampires. Melissa Rosenberg provides the screenplay for the Summit Entertainment adaptation of Stephenie Meyer’s best-selling novel, with director David Slade calling the shots behind the camera. Bryce Dallas Howard joins the cast as Victoria, the role originally played by Rachelle Lefevre in the first film.

Riveting stuff, eh?

(He’s getting sparkly!)

Bella Swan continues to act like an idiot, wanting to be turned into a vampyre but somehow balking at marrying the decaf cappuccino of vampyre fiction, Edward Cullen, and Edward Cullen continues to act like an idiot by not wanting to turn Bella into a vampyre but somehow wanting him and Bella to spend the rest of their lives together notwithstanding the fact that during the course of the last three movies, she has already become older than he is.

Mayhem ensues when… the Seattle murders catch the attention of the Volturi – the vampyre aristocracy and ruling class – who commanded that Edward turn Bella into a vampyre. See above paragraph as to why the two dimwits haven’t done this already. Oh and by the way, seriously ticked-off vampyre Victoria is très fromaged at Bella and tries to exact revenge on her for being responsible for the death of Victoria’s boyfriend (he’s killed in the first movie)

Reviews for Eclipse have generally been much more favourable than for the first two movies.

Lisa Kennedy at the Denver Post – “While the new Eclipse remains foremost a flick for devotees, it has sturdier pleasures and takes on its emotional ambitions with renewed dedication.”

Tim Martain at The Mercury – “Eclipse reinvigorates the Twilight saga, giving the fans what they want as well as being good enough to keep casual viewers interested.”

Katarina Vangopolous at MovieDex – “Eclipse surprises with (much needed) improvement; the first real blockbuster of the franchise.”

(I was cheering for Victoria [Bryce Dallas Howard] at this point! “Do it, Victoria! Do it!”)

To say Eclipse enjoyed only rave reviews is to toy with the truth.

Rafer Guzman at Newsday – “In a rare moment of insight, the teenage but immortal vampires in The Twilight Saga: Eclipse complain about being “frozen” in their lives, unable to “move forward.” So is everyone involved in this deathtrap of a franchise.”

Brian Orndorf ( “It’s interesting to see each film make Bella into an even bigger creep than previously imagined, with Eclipse turning the indecisive heroine into a mean-spirited provocateur unworthy of all the attention lavished on her.”

(Dakota Fanning as the delicious red-eyed Jane of the Volturi)

My two cents… Saying that Eclipse is the best film in ‘The Twilight Saga’ so far isn’t exactly lavishing praise on the movie. The fundamental flaw was and remains Bella Swan, both the character and Kristen Stewart’s portrayal of her. I can see teen girls swooning over the male characters every time they take off their shirts (which is rather often, really) and joining Team Edward or Team Jacob with the alacrity usually associated with American Civil War’s initial volunteers… but Bella isn’t a very nice or even interesting person. It becomes harder and harder for me to see why the other characters in the movie are so dippy about her, let alone audience members.

As for the story line and film production, it’s generally not bad, which I did not expect to find in the Twilight Saga.

Bottom line… Twilight fans will love it and the casual observers will not be put off by it. In fact, they might even become interested in sticking around for the next movie. And the next.




2 comments on “The Twilight Saga – ECLIPSE: The Third Level of Hell

  1. Perhaps you should video your watching these movies so that in the event you DO burst into flames or have an eruption of blood from your eyes that we can share this incredible event with you – posthumously, of course. 🙂

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